Yesterday we had it live here at home. I told you we have two new day dogs – one who is here five days a week and one who is here one day a week. Yesterday was the first time they were here at the same time, and shit fries what a party it has been. Full roll – all day. Not just a mental challenge for the dogs, but also real mental gymnastics for me.
The challenge was extra big because two out of three dogs are pretty much exactly a year old – Want to say; young dogs where the brain has flowed out through one ear, they have lost hearing and all ability to understand, and have a self-image that means they believe they have every right in the world to do exactly how and what they want without consequences. Plus both dogs are also of slightly tougher breeds (an amstaff and a mix between German shepherd/wolfhound).
You have no idea how thankful I am that Boyo is at least two (in about a week) years old, has regained most of his brain, hearing works roughly as it should, and that he has also learned to read me and knows what applies here at home. He has been as good as can be, although I had to nag him a lot too.
To handle one young dog is more than any sane person would like to be with. Managing two plus a still young dog is not my favorite chore, be recognized. I've hardly had anything else to do today but deal with dogs who think they own the world. Little did they know at the start of the day that I do not share their opinion, no matter how many they are and no matter how well they behaved.
Although Boyo is oldest he is still young – and also not in the least bit dominant, and the other two are too young to have learned to set boundaries in a meaningful way. The day has therefore consisted of getting up from a chair approximately every five minutes to interrupt and dampen mischief and play. Both young dogs are teases and have a hard time keeping from teasing each other – thus, I have had to keep distance between them so as not to give them too much room to trigger another outbreak of play.
Don't get me wrong. I don't mind the dogs playing. But there must be some moderation. It doesn't have to be played all the time, every second for a whole day. It is entirely possible, even as a dog, to hang out in a normal way and just be, together with the others. It must be possible to relax and rest, even if there are other dogs around.
So today has my patience (the short!) challenged to the breaking point, over and over again. I have wrestled with dogs that refuse to listen and understand that a no is a no, I have bruises and teeth marks on my hands and forearms from dogs that don't agree at all with what I want to get across, and I'm completely exhausted. And if you're wondering; both dogs are new here with me, they don't know me yet, they are young and testing limits into absurdity, they think they are bigger and fiercer than I am, and I guess they are unaccustomed to the firmness I insist on having.
Because you know what? At my house, my rules apply. It is not something that can be discussed. Not even (especially not) when you are a young dog.
What I have learned today – and yes, I also learn and am reminded of things all the time when I hang out with dogs, is that persistence pays off. It has been a struggle to get three dogs who wanted to romp all day long without rest, to understand that it is not ok here. It has been a struggle to get the energy level down, to make the dogs understand that there are other ways to socialize, and that it's ok to relax and just be.
Men. Because we are at my house and in the long run I would never put up with it like that, I've been stubborn like a damn wildebeest. I refuse to accept that in the long run, have three dogs that tear up my entire home just because they think they can do what they want. This is not how I want my life with dogs, regardless of whether it is one, two, three or twenty, will look like.
It is a a long way to go. But I actually think I've succeeded, at least a little bit. It has required an extreme amount of patience, persistence and mental strength on my part, but I believe I have set the first bar for my own leadership. How I behaved?
Verbal corrections with pressure and determination in the voice. Body language. Physical corrections in the form of pushing to the side to break a focus, as well as wrestling matches. Mental challenges in the form of demanding my space (which I write about now and then – to expand his own mental bubble so the dogs don't get past), restrictions in the dogs' space (not into a corner, but on a smaller surface area than a room) to make them calm down. And of course – patience and persistence into absurdity.
And you know what? I think I've got these two drooling dogs to actually be a little impressed with me. I think they think I'm a piece of shit who has a lot of opinions and makes demands, but I also think they think it's quite nice. For all, and it doesn't matter if you are a dog or a human (or something else), need to have a framework within which we can operate. A job without a job description is impossible to perform. Being a dog without restrictions and unlimited freedom must also be terribly stressful.
And Boyo, he probably thinks I'm the coolest of all. He has been super good and helped with corrections, even if he was pretty good too. But now he has seen me take control of obnoxious young dogs for almost a working week, and if he adored me before, he adores me all the more now. 😀
I think myself give me a little extra pat on the back for surviving the day without having a mental breakdown or having my entire home demolished. Next week it happens again, and it is my great hope that it might become somewhat calmer. He who lives will see, no?